Path of Choice
by UnknownFigment
Summary: Obi-Wan never wanted to take on another apprentice, but now he has no choice, and a new journey must begin. AU, pre-ANH.
1. A Glimpse

Chapter One: A Glimpse

It had been eons. Eons since he'd last seen Yoda, since the Empire began. Yet now Yoda called to Obi-Wan, calling him to come. Not to Dagobah. No, Yoda wasn't there. He was on another planet, Ekaphan. Equaly desolate, but inhabited, settled by a few pathetic beings who couldn't live anywhere else. Obi-Wan didn't know why Yoda was there. He didn't much care.

There were few things he cared about, now. Yoda was on the list. Planets, locations, were not.

He did wonder why Yoda had summoned him. Last time they spoke, they agreed it would be too dangerous to ever speak again, especially face-to-face. Something must have changed. He'd find out soon enough.

Now, he stood above the Lars house. The suns were setting in the west, but he could hear the family moving around below him. He found the steps and walked down them quietly.

Luke noticed him first. He had been sitting at the kitchen table, playing with droid parts with all the concentration a four-year-old could muster, but before Obi-Wan was halfway down the stairs, Luke turned around and looked straight at him.

"Aunt Bewu! It'th Ben."

Beru came out of another room, holding a bowl and a dishcloth in her hands, and smiled brightly when she saw Obi-Wan. "Ben! It's been a while, hasn't it? Do you want some tea?" She must have been thinking about her husband, how he'd banned Obi-Wan from the property, but it didn't show at all.

Obi-Wan shook his head. "I'm not here for a social call. I just needed to ask a favor."

"Oh! What's that?"

"I won't be here for the next week. Would you mind watching my droids, retrieving them if any break down? They shouldn't, but just in case..."

"Of course! Do you need a ride somewhere?"

"Oh, no. Thank you, I really appreciate this. Here's the receiver, it'll alert you if any break down, and hone in on which one it is. Simple enough to use."

Beru nodded. "We'll watch out. You aren't walking, are you?"

"No. I borrowed a speeder from the Jawas."

"The Jawas? Oh, I wouldn't trust them, if I were you."

"No, not many would, but they're honorable enough, in their own way. I'll come get that in a week or so." He nodded towards his receiver, then looked over at the boy. "Goodbye, Luke."

The child just looked up and grinned before looking back down at his parts.

"Next week, then," Beru told him.

He nodded again. "Next week."

* * *

He stood in front of a simple house in the capital of Ekaphan. He could feel Yoda inside, and another, unknown, presence. The latter was somewhat puzzling. He should have known anyone Yoda trusted enough to speak to, but he had certainly never met her. It was tempting to stay outside and try to discern more information about the second presence, but he thought better of it and entered the house.

Yoda was waiting for him in the hall, and spoke as soon as he entered. "Obi-Wan. Good to see you, it is. Something for you to do, I have."

"It's good to see you, too, Master Yoda. What's this about?"

"Come, come! Time for talk this is not. Show you, I will."

Obi-Wan followed Yoda through the dilapidated house, until the Jedi Master stopped in front of a curtained doorway, held one finger to his lips, and pulled the curtain halfway open.

It was a dusty old bedroom, with a girl on the bed, asleep. Probably four or five. Luke's age. He watched her for a moment, wondering why Yoda was showing him this, before Yoda answered his unspoken question.

"Take her with you, you will."

"Hm? Why?" he asked quietly.

"Train her, you must."

"What?!"

That came out much more loudly. Yoda shushed him and turned away from the curtain.

Obi-Wan managed to keep silent until they got to the kitchen, far enough away to let the girl sleep. Then it all came out. "I can't train her! I'm supposed to watch Luke! I couldn't possibly- Why can't you train her?"

Yoda regarded him impassively. "Good for her, you will be."

"Good for her- Hah! I'm not a teacher, look what happened to-" He stopped short of mentioning Anakin. He hadn't, not for five years. "I can't teach. Please don't do that to me. Or to her."

"Afraid, you are."

"No! I just... Even if I am, that doesn't change anything. I can't fail her. This is no joking matter, no foolish test. This is her life. If she must be trained, it should be you."

"A place to raise children, Dagobah is not." Yoda paused, and the flash of humor vanished. "Too old, am I. Too set in my ways. Adapt to the times, I cannot. All on my own, a Padewan to train... Do that, I cannot. Not strong enough, am I."

"Master Yoda, you can do anything."

"No. Believe that, do _not_."

Obi-Wan turned to stare out a window. "I thought you said that we couldn't risk training anyone. That it would attract the Emperor's attention."

"Mmm. Spoken with Qui-Gon, have you?"

He hesitated. "Not yet."

"Try harder, you should. Answer your questions, he will."

Obi-Wan didn't respond to that. There wasn't any point.

"Fine. I'll take her. I don't like it, but I'll take her."


	2. Beginnings

**AN: So I'm really bad about replying to reviews. Honestly, I didn't notice that it was possible until maybe three days ago. Anyway, I am thrilled that there are actually people out there who enjoy this story of mine, and I love you all, even if I never respond. **

**A couple of people had specific questions, and rest assured, they will be answered in the story, even if I never get around to replying. **

**On to the chapter!**

* * *

Chapter 2: The Beginnings

* * *

Yoda struggled to his feet. "Get her I will. Here stay."

Obi-Wan nodded, and put his head in his hands. Why had he agreed to this? He couldn't train her. He knew nothing. For all his years, for all his experience, he still knew nothing. He would fail, and she would pay the price.

Maybe not, he thought with rising hope. Maybe... Maybe when he'd failed before, it hadn't been his fault. Yoda believed in him.

His spirits sank again. He _knew_ it was his fault, and Yoda believed in everyone.

Still, Yoda was so certain about this, so certain that Obi-Wan should train this child. He'd never been wrong, not that Obi-Wan was aware of.

This was a mistake, but it might, just possibly, work out. He fervently hoped so.  
Yoda was back, followed by the girl.

She looked to be about the right size for a girl her age, with bright red hair. As she came in, her eyes darted around the room, scanned the floor and ceiling, met Obi-Wan's for a second, then shifted back to Yoda.

"Obi-Wan Kenobi, this is. Go with him, you will."

Her eyes flickered back towards Obi-Wan, just for a instant. He saw fear there this time, where before he'd seen only a deadened look.

He knelt down in front of her, and winced internaly as he felt her fear spike. She looked at him again, now gazing at him as steadily as she'd looked at Yoda.

"Don't worry. I'll take care of you."

That wasn't right either. Her fear rose again, until he was surprised it didn't show on her face. He wanted to say something more, but everything he knew to do only increased her terror. He stood back up, and spoke to Yoda.

"Does she have anything to prepare?"

"A knapsack she has. Beside the door it is."

"Then there is nothing else to do."

"Good to see you, it was. The next time, may it be happier."

"Yes. It's been far too long. Until next time, Master Yoda."

"And you, youngling. Speak to Obi-Wan, you should. Know that you understand me, I do." His eyes twinkled, but the girl's fear only increased. It seemed like every time they tried to befriend her, to reach out, they only scared her more.

What could have happened to her, to leave her so timid?

* * *

They left on the same cargo ship Obi-Wan had come on, when it finished loading. Two days in hyperspace, one hour of finding a new ship, another day in hyperspace, and they were home.

During that time, he learned nothing new about the girl. She still positively refused to talk, didn't respond to anything else he said, except the times he felt her fear spike up for no obvious reason, and stared at him the whole time. He tried to uncover clues to her past, but he didn't get anywhere.

She certainly wasn't a normal child. Even with his highly limited knowledge, he could tell that. She should be getting into trouble, talking up a storm... She definitely shouldn't be so submissive. She did nothing on her own initiative, nothing that he hadn't instructed her to do. If he once asked her to do something, she seemed to consider it her duty to do that every time.

Two days after they arrived, he left her alone in his house and went to retrieve his droid monitor, in the hopes that she'd do something, anything, while he was gone. As far as he could tell, his hopes were in vain. As far as he could tell, she stared at the wall for two hours.

He stopped giving her instructions after that. He told her she didn't have to do anything around the house, told her she could amuse herself, and he left her alone. She slowly turned to more normal behaviors, amusing herself with childish games and acting without glancing at him for permission. Finally, a full week after she'd arrived, she spoke.

* * *

"When're you going to start training me?" She was trying very hard to act tough and contemptuous, but it just came off as scared.

"What do you mean?" Though, really, the question wasn't that complicated. He hadn't mentioned his task, so Yoda must have told her. The only confusing part was her reaction. She was scared of being trained? Why would that be?

"Don't act stupid. They all know they're training me. They even know what they're going to train me. What're you doing, anyway? Fighting, or-" She hesitated. "Pain en-dur-ance? Or... Are you..." She stopped, staring at him frightenedly again.

"I honestly have no idea what you're talking about. I'm supposed to teach you, yes, but only if you want to learn, and not-" He stopped. She was staring at him distrustfully. "If you're talking to me, what's your name, anyway?"

"Mara Jade, but- They all know that, and you really didn't, and... and you haven't hurt me once... You really aren't one of Them?"

He paused. He didn't understand her, but there was one thing he could respond to. "I don't know who 'they' are, so I can't answer your question, but can I promise I won't hurt you, and that I won't let anyone else hurt you. I don't know what you've been through, but you will be safe here."

"You- You really, truly mean that. You aren't lying." She looked close to tears now, and he risked kneeling down and putting his hand on her shoulder.

"No. I'm not lying. I will keep you safe. I will be here for you, to protect you."  
Her tears spilled over and turned to outright sobs, and she threw herself at Obi-Wan and clung to him with every ounce of strength she had. He hugged her right back, and smiled to himself.

She would be all right.


	3. Padawan

Chapter 3: Padawan

* * *

Obi-Wan sighed, and settled back. The child was finally asleep, and he could try to meditate. He hadn't been able to, not properly, since the Jedi fell, but it was easier with her there. It was easier to keep track of reality when he could feel this girl.

He stretched out with the Force, cautiously, and closed his eyes. Without much hope, he focused on Yoda's techniques for contacting his master, and waited.

Nothing. There never was anything. So many times he'd tried, and nothing had ever happened, maybe nothing could happen and it was all a trick-

He took a deep breath. Maybe he just hadn't gotten the right mindset yet, or maybe something else was wrong. Yoda had not lied, he knew that. It was far more likely that Obi-Wan was failing.

Yoda's comments still bothered him. They sounded like Yoda thought he hadn't really tried, like he'd failed because he didn't care enough. Did Yoda really believe that? Shouldn't Yoda, of all people, know how wrong that was?

It didn't matter. It didn't matter, and he was getting far too annoyed. He took another deep breath, and released his annoyance.

* * *

"Excuse me?"

"Yes, Mara?"

"What should I call you?"

He turned to look at her. "What do you mean?"

"Should I call you Obi-Wan or Mr. Kenobi or what?"

"That's an interesting question. If you choose to let me train you, it would be traditional to call me Master Obi-Wan, but until then, and in public, perhaps Uncle Ben would be better?"

"Ben? That's not your name. And you're not my uncle."

"No, but those around here know me as Ben, and I think you'd be safer if I claimed you were related to me, adopted when your parents died."

"Even though it's a lie?"

"Yes." He paused. "I don't know how much you know about this, but if anybody found out who I am, I would be killed. The same goes for you. We don't dare tell the truth, not right now."

"So I really have a choice on whether you'll train me?"

"You will always have a choice, Mara. The Jedi's path must always be a choice."

"When do I have to decide?"

He shrugged. "I will not turn you out, whatever you decide. You have as long as you need."

* * *

"Will your training hurt?"

Obi-Wan paused to consider. "Some parts of it may. It's not easy, none of it is. But pain is never the goal, that I can promise."

* * *

"I'm bored."

Pulling himself out of meditation, he opened his eyes. "I don't have much around for someone your age to do. I'm sorry."

"Can you start training me?"

"You've decided? Already?"

"I can change my mind, right?"

"Yes."

"Then I want to do it."

"All right. Come here, and kneel in front of me. No, more like I'm doing, sit back on your heels..."

He started into a basic lesson on meditation. She learned well, complying with his instructions without hesitation and taking corrections to heart. A minute or so later, her stance was equal to any initiate in the... Obi-Wan let that thought trail off, and focused on her again.

"So now we start the actual meditation part. Just relax for a moment." He reached out with the Force, and lightly brushed against her mind, intending to guide her to the right mindset.

She didn't cooperate.

As soon as his mind touched hers, she jerked away, gave a little shriek, and stared at him.

"What's wrong, Mara?"

"You're one of... You said this would be better!"

"I don't understand."

"You're one of the Black Ones! I thought you were, but you said you were better... I should have known better than to trust you!"

"The black ones? Who are the black ones?"

She closed her eyes again, and shivered. "I thought there were just two. I thought it was just the tall, cold man and... And the hot one."

"The... hot one?"

She nodded. "The cold one's not so bad, he just feels dead, but the hot one... He burns. I hate it when he comes."

There was a horrible suspicion growing in Obi-Wan's mind. "This... hot one. What does he look like?"

"I don't see his face much, he hides it with a robe, but when I did... It was scary. All wrinkles, but they looked wrong, and his eyes were yellow. I didn't think eyes were supposed to be yellow."

"No, they aren't," Obi-Wan said distantly. The Emperor. She had been the Emperor's new apprentice. He'd assumed her to be a slave of some sort, he had assumed her Force sensitivity was a coincidence, but... The Emperor. The Emperor had had her, and now was probably searching for her, trying to recover his young toy.

Had Yoda known? Surely not. Surely he wouldn't have sent this girl here, so close to Luke, if he'd known. Surely he would have mentioned it, at the very least.

"So you are a Black One?"

The child pulled him back to the planet, and for once he was grateful for it, at least, until he decoded what she said. He spent a moment considering what she meant, and then his eyes flashed. "I am most certainly not. They're evil, horrible– Never suggest that again."

She shrank away from him. "I- I'm sorry. I didn't- I'm sorry."

He relaxed slightly, and softened his gaze. "As am I. The Black Ones, as you call them– They're no friends of mine, but I shouldn't have gotten angry. You had no way of knowing."

She stayed curled up against the wall, staring at him fearfully.

"Come here, child. I won't hurt you. I'm sorry I got angry."

She slowly moved back to where she had been, still staring at him.

"So they were training you to use the Force?"

"I- I don't know. Is that what it's called?"

"They didn't tell you?"

She shook her head. "It was mostly the cold one that trained me. He didn't like it much. He never talked to me at all. I think I made him sad."

Some part of Obi-Wan realized who the 'cold one' was, what she was talking about and why she thought that. He shut that part down without even thinking about it, as he'd done for nearly six years now. It was easier. "What did you learn?"

She shrugged. "Not much. I didn't see them, mostly. I didn't understand any of it, anyway."

"Then we'll start with the beginning. What do you know of the Force? What can you do with it?"

"It's- I dunno. Sometimes it's like a person, telling me things, like when someone's coming in, or what they're feeling. One time I made something fly, and I think it was that. I don't really know much."

"You've got the basic idea, though. The Force is an ally, more than anything else. It gives us advice whenever we listen to it. The most important part of learning to be a Jedi is learning how to trust its guidance."

"What is a Jedi?"

He sighed. Once, he would have been answer her. Now he wasn't sure. "The Jedi- They worked for good. They did all they could to make the galaxy safe."  
It wasn't close to enough. It didn't answer anything, but she seemed satisfied.

The girl was asleep (finally), and Obi-Wan had time to think. He was not fond of such times.

Once, a chance to sit for an hour with no responsibilities looming would have been a luxury. During his council days, or earlier. Even when he was an apprentice, quiet hours were few and far between. He and his master had always been on the move, busy with some adventure, off rescuing another pathetic life form his Master had picked up.

Not that he was one to talk. He'd managed to pick up a life form more pathetic than any of Qui-Gon's.

His smile faded. The girl had been tortured by the Sith themselves, for months or years. She was their newest toy, the apprentice, the next link in the Rule of Two.

Though, that was a bit odd when he thought about it. The Sith trained their apprentices in secret, keeping them from even the other Sith, yet she had met both. It was a puzzling contradiction.

Unless... He'd heard of occasions where Sith trained more than one Force-sensitive. The extras weren't true apprentices, just tools with a bit more skill. Yes. That made sense. She was one of those, not a true apprentice. That thought relieved him.

He stood up and turned off the light.

* * *

"Wake up, Initiate! We've got a busy day ahead!"

The girl opened one eye and looked up at him.

"Come on, Initiate Jade. Up. You have two minutes."

She nodded, if blearily, so Obi-Wan dropped the curtain hung between her alcove and the rest of the hovel back into place and turned toward his chest.

There wasn't much in there, just a few extra blankets, his lightsaber (and another, but he doesn't think about that, shoves down the memories), and a datapad. He took out his lightsaber and the datapad, and left everything else.

He clipped the lightsaber to his belt. They wouldn't need it today, but it's a comfort. The datapad is equally unnecessary. A silly old tradition, that the first thing a youngling learns to pick up is a datapad. A silly tradition, but he felt like following those old traditions.

He didn't mean to turn the datapad on, but he bumped something as he put it down, and it flickered to life, displaying a calender. After a moment, he looked down again at the date.

It was Empire day. Six years since the Empire began, since Obi-Wan's life ended. He smiled at that. On Imperial Center, they were celebrating right now. All throughout the galaxy, those false celebrations were going on, and here on the outskirts, the seeds of change were growing. He had the Emporer's prize student, and very close by, the boy with more Force potential than anyone.

Here on Tatooine, six years after the end of the Republic, the journey to restore it began.


	4. Another

**AN: I'm still bad at responding to reviews, but I just wanted to say I love all you guys and I'm really excited about how many people like my story. All of your questions will be answered in the story, eventually.**

**In light of that, I'm very sad to announce that this story is on hiatus until sometime in December. I'm doing something else for NaNoWriMo, and I can't multitask very well at all. Think of this as a parting present. A parting present that ends on a cliffhanger. Sorry about that.**

* * *

Chapter 4: Another

* * *

Two weeks into her training, Mara made an announcement.

"Tomorrow's my birthday."

"Really?"

"Uh-huh. I'll be six."

He smiled at her. "Congratulations."

She seemed satisfied by that, and scurried away to make her bed. Obi-Wan shifted slightly, and sighed. He hoped she didn't expect anything, any party or gift. He didn't have anything to give, didn't have any way to throw a party. He wished he could do something, but he had no ideas and no resources.

He thought about it all morning, and finally hit on the obvious solution. He considered a bit longer, then threw on his cloak, gave Mara a task to keep her busy, and went out.

* * *

He found the man working on one of his vaporators.

"Owen."

He stopped, and turned halfway around. "Oh. It's you." He turned back to his work.

This was not going to be easy. Obi-Wan took a deep breath. "I know you don't want me near Luke. I'm not going to question that. I wondered, though, if I could ask a favor."

He straightened up and turned around again. "What?"

"You see, I have a – niece – of my own, now. I'd feel better if she could talk to other people her age, occasionally, and I don't know anyone else..."

Owen stared at him for a moment, and Obi-Wan couldn't tell what he was thinking. Then he nodded abruptly. "She can come over. We're not busy tomorrow."

"Thank you. I'd like to come in to drop her off, but after that, I'll–"

"You can stay."

Obi-Wan paused, but Owen didn't seem inclined to explain. "Thank you."

"I need to fix this vaporator. Tomorrow."

"Until tomorrow."

* * *

She wasn't expecting any sort of party, that much was clear from her reaction. She was stunned when he told her his news, didn't realize it had anything to do with her birthday, and seemed to be badly frightened by the idea.

"I'm not supposed to talk to people!"

"You talk to me."

"Yeah, but- It's different! I'm not supposed to talk to you, either!"

"Mara, you're allowed to talk to anyone. Wherever you got the idea otherwise is irrelevant. You can talk as much as you like, to anyone. The only thing I ask is that you not mention your training, Jedi, the... Dark Ones, or anything relating to your previous life. I also, as I've said, believe it's best if we say that you're my niece. Other than that, I put no restrictions on who you talk to or what you talk about."

"But they'll punish me if I do."

"Nobody's going to hurt you, Mara. I promised you."

She looked doubtful. "...They've always punished me before."

He closed his eyes. This little girl, punished in unimaginable ways for daring to speak. It was so very hard not to hate the Sith.

"That's over now. You won't be punished, not for that."

It took a while, but he convinced her. She understood she could talk to anyone, and she agreed to go over. He wasn't sure she was looking forwards to it, but at least she would go.

* * *

Beru met them when they were halfway down the stairs to the Lars complex.

"Ben! It's good to see you again. Owen told me you were coming over, but he had to step out, one of the droids appears to be malfunctioning... I'm sure he'll be back soon. Why, who is this?"

"This is my niece, Mara." He steered her out from behind him, and rested one hand on her shoulder to keep her there.

Beru smiled warmly at the girl. "It's nice to meet you. Owen didn't mention you were coming, but I'm sure Luke would be glad to play with you. Come in, please."

She turned, and gestured towards a doorway, then led them over to it. Confusion was rolling off of her in waves, but she was still a flawless hostess. She'd want an explanation as soon as the girl was occupied elsewhere, no doubt about it.

"Luke? Luke, come in here. We have company." She turned back to them. "I think he's working on something, it's impossible to get his attention when he is. Do sit down. I'll bring some tea, and see if I can convince him to come."

She left the room for a minute, and came back with a tray of cups and a small boy. The boy's face brightened when he saw them. "Ben! I didn' know it was you."

"See Luke, that's why you come when I call. Mara, this is Luke, my nephew. Luke-"

"Oh, wow! Where'd you come from? I've never seen you before!"

Mara didn't answer. Her eyes darted from face to face, and she was beginning to look terrified again, more terrified than she'd looked in weeks. Maybe bringing her here was a mistake. Maybe he should have thought this through.

"Mara came to live with me a few weeks ago."

"Really? All the way out in the Wastes? Wow! I wanna go out there, but Uncle Owen never lets me." He pouted.

Beru glanced at the girl and put her tray on the table. "Please, help yourselves. Luke, why don't you and I go fetch your project, and then maybe you two can work on it together?"

Instantly, Luke forgot his problems and brightened up, ready to run gather everything. "We'll be right back! Wait here!"

Beru followed more sedately, and left Obi-Wan and Mara alone. He reached out to touch her shoulder, and felt her trembling.

"Are you all right, Mara?"

She looked up at him, and she was still terrified, almost as terrified as that first day. "Are you sure I'm allowed to talk? Are you sure they won't hurt me?"

"I'm sure, Mara. You're safe now. Nobody is going to hurt you."

"Promise?"

"I promise. You will be safe here." She looked slightly less terrified, but she still wasn't really relaxed. "Remember what I've taught you. Take a deep breath, and remember you're safe here. Nobody will hurt you."

She listened to what he said, and a moment later, she picked up her cup and took a sip. He smiled, and followed suit.

The native Tatooine 'tea' was nothing like the tea he was familiar with, but it wasn't bad. He didn't know how to describe it, but it fit the setting. It had a rustic taste to it that matched its makers perfectly. Besides, it was wet, and as cool as anything could be in this heat. He was pretty sure there were thousands of rituals surrounding it, very few of which he understood. Once, it had been a point of pride for him to know everything he could about a culture's customs before he set foot on their planet. Now it didn't matter.

Luke was back, and his aunt. He dumped a load of mechanical scraps on the other end of the table, and impatiently tugged about half of his aunt's load out of her arms. "Come on, Mara! I'll show you what I'm doing!"

She stood up with surprising composure, and walked over beside him to survey his work. After a moment, she spoke. "What is this?"

"A Frightener! To keep the Jawas away from our mushrooms. Here, this is-"

"You're missing a power source."

"Yeah, Uncle Owen said he'd-"

"And that part's connected wrong."

"Are you sure? It looks right to me."

"It's backwards. Look, you can see the squigly lines are weird, they should match the ones here..."

The two of them set to work, arguing about whether the part was connected correctly, and Beru laughed quietly. "Did you ever see the like? Luke's just past his sixth birthday, she can't be much older than that, and yet they both know more about mechanics than I do. It's remarkable."

"That it is. Incidentally... A Frightener?"

"That's what he calls it. It's really just a type of buzzer. Turns out Jawas can't stand being too close to the sound, so Owen thought he'd install them on the Vaporaters. Luke watched him build the first one and begged to be allowed to try."

"Ah."

"So..." She paused. "Is she really your niece?"

"No. Not by blood. But it's safer to say that."

"Yes." She was quiet for a minute, then spoke again, slowly. "You said... that Luke had a sister. She's not, by any chance..."

"No. That girl is safe with her family. I don't know where Mara came from, but she's not Luke's sister."

Beru nodded. "Where did you find her?"

"My oldest friend. He couldn't care for her, so he asked me to."

"She's a sweet girl. You must be glad to have her around."

The moved on to less serious things after that, the weather and news of their neighbors and some small happenings across galaxy that Beru had picked up in the market. Beru did most of the talking. Obi-Wan wished he could contribute more, but the years of solitude had given him little fuel for small talk.

Owen came back perhaps an hour after they arrived, and Beru wandered away, probably to finish up all the chores Obi-Wan had interupted. Owen was quieter than his wife, but when he did talk, it was less about current events, and easier for Obi-Wan to respond to. Obi-Wan had expected another round of questions about Mara, but for a long time, he didn't ask any at all, and when he did, it was only one.

"You're training her, aren't you? Because I wouldn't let you train Luke."

"Not because. But yes, I am training her."

An hour more, and it was time for them to go. Luke kicked up huge fuss about that, and when it was finally explained that they really had to leave, he applied to his aunt. "They can come back, right, Aunt Beru?"

"I don't know, dear. We're all very busy, you know."

"But Mara helped me! We made loads of progress on the Frightener, I got way more done than before! They can come back, Uncle Owen, can't they?"

Owen glanced at Mara and frowned thoughtfully for a minute. "All right, then."

Beru carefully hid her surprise, and Luke bounced with excitement. "Yay! Thanks, Uncle Owen! Can they come back next tomorrow? Please?"

"I meant it when I said we were all busy, Luke! But perhaps sometimes next week."

* * *

On their fourth visit, Obi-Wan noticed that everyone was quieter than usual. Owen's expression passed stern and entered dour, Beru was noticably less cheerful, and even Luke was almost subdued.

He didn't get any hints as to what it was about until the end, when Owen pulled him aside.

"You can train him."

"What?"

"I changed my mind. You can train Luke. When you have the time."

Obi-Wan stared at him for a minute. Why now? What had happened?

And those questions were unimportant. This was a bad idea, really. Far too risky. Training Mara was risk enough. Yet the Force was telling him to agree. The Force had never been wrong.

"Thank you. I'm- I will train him."

What in blazes had changed the man's mind?


	5. Reflections

**AN: I am so sorry it's taken this long! I really intended to get it out much sooner, but after NaNo, it took nearly a month and a half to even sit down to write again, and then this chapter turned out to be extremely difficult to figure out. I'm still not entirely happy with it, but it's complete. **

**On the good side, I have a much better grip on the story's direction, and a very rough outline! The next chapters ****_should_**** be easier.**

Chapter 5: Reflections

When Obi-Wan reached home, he got out his precious store of teas, brought from far away and hoarded over the years. The occasion seemed to warrant something special. He heated the kettle, offered a cup to Mara and was turned down, and sat down to think.

This was all so bizzare, almost surreal. Years ago, he'd given up on training Luke, at least until Luke grew old enough to choose his own path. Even before Owen had absolutely forbidden it, Obi-Wan had wondered whether it was a good idea, whether he would fail the child as he'd failed before. Yet now he'd taken on the job without hesitation, without planning, without consideration. He'd chosen to train two Padawans at once with no help, no support, and little experience. All because it seemed like a good idea. It was more than bizzare, it was insane.

He looked into his cup and took a deep breath. This would work. This would work, even if it was dangerous and stupid and he really should have at least mentioned it to Yoda before agreeing, even if he really should have thought.  
He brought his mug up and took a sip. None of this made any sense, and he doubted it would suddenly make more sense later, but life had never been about order or predictability. Life had always been a game of learning as much as he could and improvising enough to survive.

* * *

For the rest of the week, he didn't worry. He pushed his new assignment to the back of his mind and focused on Mara. She was making tremendous progress, after all, and needed the guidance. Everything she'd learned before had to be relearned with an emphasis on peace, serenity, and how all this stuff actually worked. She needed to learn all sorts of basic Force Theory, and they spent quite a lot of time talking over morals and evil and avoiding the Dark Side.

In many ways, she was an ideal Padawan. He never had a problem with obedience, she was quiet, neat, and took everything he said to heart instantly. He was grateful for that much, and worried about the rest.

She'd been raised by the Sith. Everything she'd ever learned had been aimed at making her an asset, a valuable tool. Her entire life was built on fears he couldn't begin to allay. Whenever she did something so easily and perfectly, without a hint of questioning his authority, he felt guilty. He knew she still feared him, if only subconciously. She still didn't trust him, not really. He still didn't know how to deal with it.

He was concerned about this, but it was easy to forget most of the time. It was easy to train her without thoughts of the future. Maybe it was even the right thing to do.

* * *

"Master?"

"Yes, Mara?"

"You're worried about something, aren't you?"

"I-" He stopped. A choice seemed to hang in the air before him. What secrets should he keep? "I'm always worried, Padewan."

"More worried. You- I don't know. You talked to someone, or didn't." She made a face. "It's all mixed up."

He smiled. "Your skills in perception are increasing. Well done."

"So?"

"What do you mean?"

"So why are you so worried?"

He sighed. She was so earnest, determined to understand what was wrong. He doubted she'd be satisfied with a short answer. Initiates rarely were, in his experience. "I made a promise, and I don't know if it was wise."

"But a Jedi has to keep his promises. You said."

"I know, young one. That's why I'm worried."

"Oh." She contemplated that for a bit. "So you're going to keep it?"

"Of course. Did I not teach this to you yesterday? I meant it."

"Do you ever wish you didn't have to keep every promise?"

"Sometimes. Sometimes I've even broken one."

"You have?" She looked at him with large eyes. "But you said Jedi don't, not ever. Was it a mistake?"

Somewhere in his mind's eye, he could see a pyre and a boy and the beginning of something great and terrible. Somewhere inside he was an earnest young Jedi, just setting out and determined to do everything right. He took a deep breath, and focused on the present, on the child quietly awaiting an answer.

"Yes, it was. I made promises so foolish, and I knew nothing. I tried, so very hard, but I could never have kept it. It- It was all a mistake. All of it."

"And you're worried this promise is another mistake?"

He ordered himself not to think about it. He took another deep breath, released his feelings, and buried his memories. He was the picture of Jedi calm.

"Yes. I worry about that."

* * *

A few days later, he sat at the table with Beru, watching the children playing in the courtyard. The tension in the household was looming over his head, and he worried about his new task. Nothing would be easy. He didn't even understand what was going on.

Well. He could learn about that, at least.

"Why did he agree?" he asked Beru softly. "Why did he change his mind?"

She sighed, and set her patchwork aside. There was no need for him to clarify. "I don't know. He won't tell me. But- I understand him. I have a pretty good guess.

"You see, my husband is immensely proud of what he has. He's proud of his job, his life, and he can't imagine anything better. He's proud of his family, their traditions, he's proud of me, and more than anything else, he's proud of his son."

She looked past Obi-Wan, at the boy sprawled in the dust, and smiled slightly. "We call him our nephew, I know, but really, he's always been our own. I could never imagine life without him..."

She trailed off for a moment, then smiled and glanced at Obi-Wan. "Sorry. We want to give Luke the best we can, of course, and Owen's always believed that this life is the best, the one everyone should have, the one that'll make Luke happiest. He resents you, just a bit, for saying that he's wrong, but he doesn't believe you. He sees the life you're offering as nothing more than constant trouble and upheaval, and doesn't believe that anybody could want that."

"So what changed his mind?"

"Mara did. You see, all these years, behind all that pride and belief and love, in a place where he himself never acknowledges it, he's always known Luke was the last hope for peace, and he's always been very, very proud of that. He always remembered, somewhere in the back of his head, that the last Jedi was here just to protect his Luke, because his Luke was that important."

"So when I told him I'd started training Mara..."

"He came face to face with the idea that you weren't going to wait forever, and that he was keeping Luke from developing his powers. He realized that the idea of somebody else taking Luke's place as hero was terrifying. He still believed in this life, but suddenly, it wasn't the only option. He didn't know what to think."

"What decided him?"

"I don't know. It could have been any number of things, but... I think he saw how well Mara was doing. I watched her, that first day, and I saw how timid she was, terrified to talk to us, terrified of being wrong, and her eyes... Her eyes looked haunted, that first day. And now look at her." She gestured towards the two of them.

They lay on their stomachs in the courtyard, doodling in the sand and waving their feet through the air. She looked almost carefree, almost like just another farmgirl. Nobody would ever have guessed she was the same girl, that two months ago she'd been terrified of everything. She wasn't healed, he knew that, but the wounds had disappeared from view.

"Under your meddling influence, she's become a normal child. I think my husband saw what she was, and wasn't, becoming, and thought that perhaps this training wasn't as bad as he'd told himself."

Obi-Wan kept watching the children for a long moment, turning over another question in his mind.

"I have to ask," he finally said. "If he accepted Luke as the last hope... Then, well, why did Luke's happiness matter so much? I mean- Not that you shouldn't... I understand his concern, of course, but it seems–"

She laughed, just slightly. "Not everybody has the self-knowledge of a Jedi. He never understood any of this, not really, until recently." She waited for him to respond, but he had nothing to say, and so she continued. "I shouldn't get involved, but if you're going to train Luke, please, start soon. It's hard on Owen, this waiting. This is all hard on him. He doesn't know anything about this, and it upsets him – upsets all of us, really."

* * *

That night, Obi-Wan sat outside counting the moons, feeling more at peace than he had in a week, and maybe far longer. He had answers for many of his questions, and knowing was always easier.

Understanding more about the task made it less daunting, even if it really shouldn't. He had still promised to take on two Padawans, both of whom promised to be difficult in their own ways, entirely unsupported. It would be difficult, he knew that, and yet now that he knew more, he wasn't worried at all.

He knew this was the will of the Force, and so he knew everything would work out in the end.

**(AN re: "counting the moons": I imagine that canonically, Tatooine has only the four moons we saw in AotC. I just love the idea of a planet with so many moons that counting how many are visible in the sky tonight is a common passtime. After all, we only get one shot of the night sky, right? What are the odds that all of the moons would be in that one shot?)**


	6. Philosophy

**AN: Sorry this has taken so long! I actually finished this a few weeks ago, but, well, this is an important chapter. I spent a while editing it, and I'm still not really satisfied. Any input you have, anything at all, would be appreciated even more than normal, and that's saying something. **

* * *

Chapter 6: Philosophy

The next morning, Obi-Wan dug out his ancient com unit, and selected the first of three numbers programmed in, the one labled "neighbor". He sent a few lines, telling them he was ready. No details. It was likely overcautious, but this was the life he had now. He spent a moment wishing for a life without paranoia, then turned back to Mara's meditation lesson.

It was another hour or so before he sensed their approach. When he did, he stood. "Well done, Mara. That's enough for now."

She frowned with confusion at the abrupt end. This was the first time he'd interrupted a lesson, and he'd noticed she wasn't fond of new ideas, or unexpected changes in general. With that in mind, he fleetingly debated warning her about these new visitors.

No. He would not. He would let her be surprised and see how she reacted. She had to learn adaptability eventually, and it would be easier early on.

A buzz put an end to his deliberation. He straightened up and walked over to the door, carefully monitoring Mara's surge of confusion and anxiety. She seemed to be doing a fine job at controlling it, but she was still new enough at this that her control could slip at any time.

He opened the door, and smiled at Beru and Luke, trying to dig up forgotten social conventions. It had been so long since he'd played host.

"Welcome. It's good to see you again." He stepped back and motioned them in.

Beru started to reply with some similar polite statement, but before she was more than a syllable in, Luke wriggled free from her restraining hand and rushed in to the house, talking all the way.

"Wow, look at this house! It's all above ground and everything! Hi, Mara! What're you doing?"

"Luke! Come back over here and say hello to Ben before you forget again. I'm sorry," she told Obi-Wan. "He's so excited about being out here, but that's no excuse for him to forget his manners."

He smiled. "Children will be children, no matter how you train them."

"And yet I'll never stop wishing I could change that."

"Oh, that would be wonderful. A child who listened to you."

"I listen!" Mara told them, with her brow furrowed.

"Indeed you do, child. That makes you an exception."

Luke suddenly became interested in their conversation, and hurried over. "I'm an exception too, right, Aunt Beru?"

Beru laughed at that, and tousled his hair. "You're an exception to many things, Luke, but I'm afraid you are dead average when it comes to obedience."

He looked a bit put out by that, but his spirits bounced back in about a second flat and he turned back to examining the house. Obi-Wan took the opportunity to offer Beru a chair. She started to speak, then hesitated.

"I was wondering if I could talk to you. Without – them."

"Certainly. Outside, perhaps?"

She nodded and looked over at her nephew, who was prodding at the chairs.

"Luke, we'll be back in a few minutes. Behave yourself, all right?"

He nodded earnestly and she turned back towards the door. Obi-Wan followed her, wondering what this was about.

They stepped out onto the blazing sand. Obi-Wan spared a second to wish for a cooler enviroment. It seemed he would never adjust to living on this barren planet.

Beru walked a few meters away from the house at a clip rather faster than Obi-Wan had anticipated. When caught up with her, she turned around, a fierce look of determination in her eyes. Obi-Wan came very close to stepping back from it. Somehow, this short, kind woman managed to be more frightening than all the legions of enemies he'd faced as a Jedi.

"I've always supported Luke's training. I'm glad he has the chance. But I tell you right now, all my support vanishes if you intend to turn him into an emotionless robot."

Obi-Wan blinked. "The Code–"

"Yes, I've read your precious Code. Serenity and peace– I don't have a problem with those. By all means, teach him not to act in anger. Teach him to calm down. Teach him to accept death. Never deny that he has emotions, or that he cares about people close to him."

"Learning to let go of emotion and attatchment is the most important part of a Jedi's training. I will not forgo that."

"Really? Well, all the Jedi I've ever met had as much of both as anyone, they were just in denial."

"Out here? How many Jedi-" He cut himself off. Foolish question, he already knew the answer. Far too well, in fact. "I suppose you wouldn't believe those were special cases."

"The ones I met? Of course. I heard a story of a third, though, from someone I trusted completely. She said she had several hours to talk to him, and there wasn't a thing he said without mentioning his apprentice. She said she couldn't think of him as anything other than a proud father. She said that was why she was willing to trust him with her son."

Obi-Wan turned away. "I have reason to believe she was mistaken. About his feelings."

"It would make for the only time Shmi misread something. But this isn't what I want to argue about. It doesn't matter what normal Jedi felt or didn't feel, because Luke won't be a normal Jedi. You know what he'll have to face, and who. He needs practice understanding emotions and learning how to deal with them. He doesn't need to be told they don't exist."

"The Jedi techniques are well proven."

"Are they? Are they really? I watched Anakin, when he came here. He was so conflicted I'm surprised he could get out of bed in the morning, much less pass for a calm and collected Padawan. He was worried about his mother, worried about you, angry at you, angry at us, struggling with unrequited love, and suffering self-hatred because of all of these emotions. And this was before his mother died. I... I didn't pay much attention after."

"You got all this from a look?" He looked back at her, rather incredulously.

"Oh– No. I talked to Padmé for quite some time. She taught me quite a lot about how to judge Jedi emotions, actually. Her and Shmi, both. But that's beside the point."

"Indeed. As far as I see, you are basing your opinions of the entire Order's structure on an old story and the actions of one confused apprentice."

She sighed. "No, I'm not. I just thought it was kinder to use those examples. My real example is you, but I thought, maybe he'll be reasonable. Maybe I won't have to point out to his face how inconsistent he's being."

He could probably make some clever reply, Obi-Wan thought distantly, but he doubted it would make a difference. He just stared off at the horizon, quietly dreading whatever was to come.

"From this conversation alone I could have gathered enough evidence to support my point, just in your reactions! You flinched when I said Anakin's name, even after all this time, and your face when you realized I was talking about Qui-Gon – I wish you could have seen it! It would change anybody's mind, no matter how strongly they believed Jedi don't form attatchments!"

"I never claimed I was an ideal Jedi. Far from it."

"The Jedi did, though, didn't they? You were on their council. A general. Respected Master." She waited for him to respond, but he had nothing to say. After a minute, she went on. "I don't want you you to tell him that the people around him are more important than anything. Teach him to cherish the friends and family he has, and teach him to let go of them and move on when it's time. Teach him to love the people around him, and to love the universe even more. That's all I'm asking."

"The Code supported the Jedi for a thousand generations. Who am I to change it?" He felt very tired all of a sudden.

"The Code got all your fellow Jedi killed. The Code twisted your apprentice from a sweet, cheerful boy into a monster. If you want to keep denying your emotions and ignoring your pain, that's not my concern. But if you refuse to listen to reason, if you're blind enough to try to teach Luke the same way you taught Anakin, if you refuse to even try to figure out what mistakes you made last time, then we're leaving."

She paused, and her voice gained even more steel. "If I see Luke displaying even a hint of that emotional tangle I saw in Anakin, then we'll pack up in the middle of the night and vanish, move somewhere far, far, away where you can't find us, where you can't do anything more. And if you try to follow us, if you somehow manage to find us, I'll turn you in to the Empire myself. I won't give you second chances, not when it's Luke's life on the line."

He didn't have anything to say in response, and she appeared to have said everything she wanted to. He heard her turn around and walk back to the house, but he didn't move.

In order to train the last hope for the galaxy, he was going to have to entirely ignore all the wisdom the Jedi had collected in all of written memory, and he wasn't even certain he disagreed with the necesity.

Yoda was going to kill him.


	7. Storytime

**AN: Sorry for the radio silence! That should get better in the near future, as I'll be working on this story for CampNaNoWriMo this month. Should mean updates about once a week, for quite some time. I also outlined the next twenty chapters, making this my most planned story ever. **

**Thanks for all the input on the last chapter! They guided me to some valuable points to address in the next chapter, and were in general quite helpful. I put a lot of thought into the last chapter, so I'm unlikely to change anything dramatic about the views expressed there, but I'm glad for the input on what to tweak. **

**Finally, I just wanted to note that this marks the beginning of a shift in story direction! Prior to this, we've been focused fairly tightly on Obi-Wan and his problems. Other characters will get the spotlight more from here on out, starting right now. **

* * *

Chapter 7: Storytime

Luke was being good. In fact, he was being _very_ good, because this place was really, really, cool, and Aunt Beru had explained that if he wasn't _very_ good while he was there, he might not get to come back.

So he was only looking through the cabinets, even though the plates looked like a lot of fun to bang together and there was a weird device which he'd love to take apart. He thought he was doing splendidly.

He didn't understand at all when his aunt came back in, looked annoyed, and swooped over to close the cabinet.

"No, Luke, we don't go through other people's things."

"Why not?"

"It's not polite."

"But it's fun!" He didn't expect her to be swayed by this argument. She never was, even though it seemed perfectly logical to Luke.

She didn't even reply, this time, so he sighed and walked back over to where Mara was sitting, doodling on the floor with one finger. "Can I see your toys?"

She looked up at him, and Luke thought she was surprised. He didn't understand that. It wasn't that weird of a question, was it? He didn't think so, anyway, but it was taking her a long time to answer.

"I don't have any." Her voice was quiet, but definitely not scared or anything. It reminded him of how his aunt sounded when he asked about his dad.

"Why not? Is it because you just came here? Didn't you have toys where you were before? What happened to them? Why-"

His aunt said his name very quietly. He turned to see what she had to say, but before his aunt had any chance to say anything, Mara exploded.

It didn't sound like an explosion, though. He knew she was upset, but she sounded scary rather than angry.

"Just leave me alone! I don't want to talk to you any more! You're stupid!" She turned away from Luke, fists clenched, and then suddenly jerked back around to look at Ben, behind him, with huge eyes. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to! I just– I got angry anyway and– and–"

She burst into tears, and brought her fists up to cover her eyes. Then she just stood there, sobbing. Luke wanted to do something, but he didn't have any ideas at all.

Fortunately, Ben seemed to understand better. He strode past Luke, dropped to his knees beside Mara, and hugged her tightly. "It's all right, Mara," he said, softly enough Luke had a bit of trouble hearing. "It's all right. You did very well. I'm proud of you."

"But– I got angry, and– I hurt Luke's feelings, I didn't mean to, I didn't, but it was just– He kept–" She burst into tears again, and buried her face in Ben's shoulder.

"Shh, young one," he said gently. "It's all right. You kept your temper for a long time, even on a difficult subject. You regained control extremely quickly. There's nothing to be ashamed of, Mara. Everyone slips sometimes."

"I _failed_."

"Yes. But you can't give up, can you? You have to keep trying."

She pulled away, with her eyes squeezed tightly shut, and whispered "I know."

Ben reached forwards to brush some hair back out of her face. "Remember this, young one, when you're losing control. You can never take back words or actions. Always be mindful of whether you'll regret them later."

She nodded seriously and took a deep breath, relaxing visibly. Then she just stood there, breathing.

Luke was very confused by this point, and he knew from painful experience that confusion led to boredom. Unfortunately, he couldn't do anything about it, because Aunt Beru had noticed his confusion and moved to prevent him from squirming. She was just holding his shoulders, so if he really wanted to get away it wouldn't be too hard, but he knew she wouldn't be happy if he tried. So he was stuck watching Mara and Ben take deep breaths.

At least they weren't talking any more, he thought optimistically. Maybe Mara would get bored soon too.

That didn't seem to happen, but fortunately they finished breathing deeply– or whatever it was they were doing– pretty quickly. Ben stood up, and Mara dried off her face and turned to face him with downcast eyes.

"I'm sorry I called you stupid and yelled at you."

"It's okay. I get angry too, sometimes! Usually when Aunt Beru wants me to do chores." She looked a bit shocked by that, but he was too busy talking to really notice. "So what do you do all the way out here, if you don't have any toys? Do you have mechanics or something? Or do you get to go exploring? Can we go exploring, Aunt Beru!?"

"No, Luke. But..." She glanced at Ben. "Perhaps you could listen to Ben for a while?"

"A story?" He asked, leaning forward. Beside him, Mara sat up a little straighter.

Ben smiled. "I suppose it is. The story of a better time." He paused to gaze out the window for a moment. "Luke, what do you know of the time before the Empire?"

"Oh! It was a _really_ long time ago, like before I was born! An'... An' Uncle Owen says I'm not supposed to talk about it." He frowned, and looked over at his aunt.

"You can talk to Ben," she reassured him.

"Okay! Actually I don't think I know anything more anyway. Do you?"

"Indeed. It seems long ago to you, but for me, it was yesterday. The galaxy lived in an era of peace and prosperity."

"What does that mean?" Luke asked.

"It was a time when nobody was afraid, and everybody lived a good life. A time of happiness."

Luke listened eagerly as Ben told the story. It was a weird story, really. There weren't any people in it, just descriptions of how great life was and how happy everybody was. Still, it was a lot more exciting than most of his Aunt's stories, which he'd already heard a million times.

It got even more exciting when he finished talking about the great stuff everybody could do with all their freedoms. That was when he started telling them about the Jedi, who were really super-cool wizards who flew around making everything better, so people didn't have to worry at all. The way Ben told it, they could do anything, and Luke was beginning to wonder why all the stories in the universe weren't about the Jedi.

He still didn't say anything about any one person, though. Luke wished he would. He liked best hearing about people.

Finally, he broke off in the middle of talking about Jedi's powers, and looked at Luke.

"Would you like to learn some of the Jedi's teachings?"

Luke's jaw dropped, and he stared in flat disbelief for a moment. "Yes!"

Ben smiled gently. "Very well." He got up from the chair and knelt down on the floor in front of them. "We'll start with the ancient art of meditation. Here, this is the traditional stance..."

* * *

It wasn't as exciting as it had sounded. He'd imagined awesome mind powers or something, but it turned out that what Ben wanted him to do was to sit. Without moving, or even thinking. It was actually pretty boring, and really difficult, but he kept at it. Partly because the Jedi must have had some reason for doing this and he trusted their judgement, but mostly because Mara was sitting right beside him, and she was much better. Luke didn't care that she was better, but she was proud of it, and that was annoying.

Actually, she wasn't even so much proud of what she could do as she was amused by his every twitch. It still kept him from wriggling, though.

Mostly.

* * *

Usually after staying quiet that long he would have been all over the place, but as they were leaving Luke felt strangely calm. He didn't even really want to talk, which was definitely weird. Aunt Beru was probably happy about it, though. She always wanted him to talk less.

Finally, a question occurred to him, and he was curious enough to ask. "Aunt Beru, how did Ben know that Jedi thingy?"

She kept looking ahead while she answered. "Well, I suppose because he was one, once upon a time."

"Old Ben was a Jedi? Really?"

"He was."

"Wow! So he could do all that stuff? Make everything fly and fix the world and anything else he wanted?"

"He could do some. Not all that."

"What? But he said they could do all sorts of stuff!"

"They had powers, but they couldn't do everything. Nobody's all-powerful." She finally turned to look at him, and her eyes were scary intense, worse than he'd ever seen them. "And nobody should be. Remember that."


End file.
